Sunday, July 8, 2018

BLOG #23: MEAN PEOPLE SUCK!

We here at Cheshire Industries cannot abide bullies, willful stupidity, or just plain impoliteness. After watching a recent episode of Celebrity Undercover Boss featuring the curvaceous Beauty Ashley Graham, I was particularly outraged by a certain person's crude and completely unnaceptable behaviour towards her and her equally curvaceous companion, Helei Amini (See Blog #22: The Awesomeness of Ashley Graham).

In brief: In the June 2018 episode of Celebrity Undercover Boss featuring Ashley Graham, the VP of Operations at DAS Modeling Agency decided that he would show what an unbelievable jackass he could be by turning away a disguised Ashley Graham because, he said, giving measurements to girls of "her kind" (that is to say, curvy or "big" girls) was a waste of his time and money.

Aside from his inevitable embarrassment when he discovers that he turned away Ashley-frakking-Graham, a girl with the kinds of dangerous curves Lamborghinis dream of, I was so disgusted by his treatment of her and Helei Amini that I wanted to send my flying monkey friends from Flying Face-Humpers Anonymous to go see him. Sure, they'd fall off the wagon, but if anyone deserves to be face-humped by neurotic monkeys, it's that twatwaffle.

Now, while it is absolutely commendable that neither of these Beautiful women gave that boorish idiot a second thought, I'm not so forgiving. His behaviour is simply not acceptable. Luckily for him, I don't think it'd be ethical to enable my simian friends at FFHA to fall off the wagon just to satisfy my own sense of moral outrage, especially when they've all been doing so well lately. Le Sigh...

While watching the show, I wondered idly what the "DAS" in DAS Modeling Agency stands for. Since I cannot in good conscious arrange the frantic face-humping pelvic escapades he deserves, I've been amusing myself coming up with meanings for the company's name. The best one I came up with so far is:

It should_stand for "Digging All Sizes," but clearly they're Dumb As Shit.

If anyone else has any ideas, I'd be happy to hear them!

Seriously, though, people. What the frak is wrong with this world? Why do people think it is acceptable to be outrageous dicks to other people? In an era where you can communicate with literally the entire world in an instant, how can we as human beings still be so narrow sighted that something as insignificant as a person's weight or their skin colour or their sexual preferences can dictate how we treat them?

It's not right. If everyone put as much time in working out the problems of the world as they did in creating vicious and reprehensibly cruel memes about other people they don't even know, we wouldn't have nearly as frakked up a world as we do now.

So I'm throwing down the gauntlet. If you're reading this, I challenge you to go out of your way to do something nice today for a complete stranger. Do something to counteract this epidemic of nastiness in the world. And don't retweet shitty, abusive messages, memes, blogs, or other posts; don't give those nasties the fuel to spread their misery. If you can, delete those kinds of bilge whenever you find them (Ethical hackers, I'm talking to you!).

If I were in the Freeworld with you, I swear I'd have no reservations about dedicating my life to a campaign of online and Freeworld promotion of the kinds of positive messages that people like Ashley Graham, Lizzy Howell, Alexa Phelese, Helei Amini, and others like them have already begun to spread. I'd do it on my own if I had to, even if nobody else was helping me. But I know I'm not the only one that feels this way. I can't be.

It's no enough to feel outraged by hatred and bullies, my friends. You have voices, use them. DO something!

The preceding message has been brought to you by Cheshire Industries and is sponsored by the hope that people will stop being outrageous dicks to one another; the dream of a time when people will put more time into encouraging each other than being cruel; and your local chapter of Flying Face-Humpers Anonymous. Thank you.

I AM The Kyle and I absolutely approve this message!

1 comment:

  1. One of my favorite lyrics is “Why are some people locked up for life but some people can’t say anything nice.” Song is Why by Supaman

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