Part Two: Fizzled Factions and Wasted Talents
In
the world of wrestling, everybody knows that airtime is at a premium,
and that not every wrestling talent is going to get spotlight every
show. It is also accepted as fact that not all talent is going to wow
the crowds. Sometimes a character just falls flat. This is an accepted
fact of reality.
Unfortunately, WWE has fallen into the
lamentable habit of completely wasting good talent and valuable airtime.
Obvious fan favourites are ignored in favour of established "Family
Names," or are forced into completely ridiculous storylines and
scenarios that erode their popularity until they're forced to go
elsewhere.
Remember Ryback? This guy went from being an anonymous
musclebound meathead in Wade Barrett's Nexus faction to a fan favourite
with his iconic "Feed Me More" catchphrase and wardrobe that he
appeared to have raided from Rob Van Dam's closet -- no shade, here;
I've always thought Van Dam's spandex were the best in the business!
Ryback took WWE by storm, a physical specimen who looked like a
wrestling God. You'd think that someone who looked like him, performed
like him, and had such a strong fan base would have been a hands down
favourite for a championship, right?
Wrong. Instead of showcasing
Ryback's actual skill, WWE constantly put him in creampuff matches with
local amateurs and absolute nobodies. Yes, it's cool the first couple
times you see someone like Ryback dumptruck a couple of idiots, stack
them on his shoulders at the same time and Shellshock them into the
matt. This kind of thing is meant to establish him as a real danger to
any competition he might have in the main roster.
But the
creampuff matches just kept coming. And when they finally did give
Ryback an opportunity at real matches, it looked like he was finally
going to get his shot. But in his very first WWE Championship match at a
pay-per-view, it went like this:
1) Ryback beat the ever loving piss out of his opponent.
2) His opponent tried to rally and couldn't.
3) Ryback set his opponent up for his finishing move, The Shellshock.
4) The frakking referee low-blowed Ryback!
This
nobody referee low-blows Ryback, costing him his championship
opportunity. Apparently, he was supposed to be a new talent hitting the
roster.
Do you know how many matches this nobody referee ended up
having on WWE? One. One! He lost that match and he hasn't been seen
since.
Instead of giving Ryback the comeback story and the
eventual championship opportunity that he deserved, WWE instead went
right back to putting Ryback into creampuff match after creampuff match,
until they decided they were going to turn him into the next Goldberg.
They did away with his flashy graphic tights and put him in
Goldberg-like black trunks. Then Goldberg announced his return to
wrestling and WWE's Goldberg clone hasn't been seen since.
This
is just one of the examples of great talent that WWE has wasted. It's
gotten really bad since The Ascension. This tag team got months of
foreshadowing, all kinds of ominous warnings about their arrival and
were set up to be the next major tag team. But before their first
match they come out and claim they're better than Road Warriors!
Absolute BLASPHEMY! This immediately cost them any fan base they had
accrued from their initial promos, something WWE had to know would
happen. They ended up disappearing very shortly thereafter.
Authors
of Pain. Arguably the biggest (physically speaking) tag team to hit WWE
in a long time. They got the Ryback treatment: nothing but creampuff
matches and then set aside without any real competition. They were made
Tag Team Champions for maybe a week. I think. They didn't keep them long
enough to remember.
Most recently, do you remember the months of
attacks the WWE suffered at the hands of Retribution? This new faction
ragdolled the ENTIRE WWE with their attacks, devastating the ring, and
trashing everything in sight. Superstars were getting jumped and put on
the injury list because of them.
When finally they debuted:
T-Bar, Mace, Slapjack, and Reckoning were expected to bulldoze the
roster in the ring. Their arrival was hailed as a new era in WWE.
Instead, Reckoning (the only female of the group) got one match and lost
(both her mask and the match). The other three members of the faction
have lost almost every match they've been in since. All the fear they'd
established in the beginning, gone. Apparently, Retribution is great at
sneak attacks, but in a straight fight, they've got nothing.
It's
gotten so bad that their leader and founder of the group, Mustafa Ali,
go fed up with them and quit the group entirely. On the most recent
episode of Raw, T-Bar & Mace got their masks ripped off, which
heralds another end to a great would-be faction.
The list goes
on; fan favourite talent and potentially dynamite blockbusters
completely shafted by WWE's mismanagement. Eric Rowan & Luke Harper
(both individually and as The Bludgeon Brothers), Adam Rose (remembered
him and his sidekick, the Bunny?), Lars Sullivan, Mojo Rawley, Jinder
Mahal, and Rusev _(DAAAAAY!)._
Jinder Mahal deserves special
mention, because it showcases how WWE treats their talent. He was a
small time player, whose lowest point was indisputably 3-Man Band. But
then he disappeared for a while, only to return in spectacular fashion
bigger and badder than ever. Dude was shredded! And his attitude,
nothing short of vicious!
Here's the problem, though: Jinder returned just in
time for Crown Jewel -- WWE's pay-per-view in the Middle East. He won
the WWE World Championship prior to this premiere pay-per-view. He went
on to successfully defend his title at Crown Jewel against Randy Orton.
He held the title for a short time thereafter, but as soon as he lost
it, he disappeared again. Why? Because WWE didn't have an impending
return to Crown Jewel, not for another year. WWE didn't need him to
curry Middle Eastern goodwill. This has become typical of WWE.
Two
other Superstars deserve mention in this, both of whom are currently
suffering this craptastic treatment: Dexter Loomis and The Fiend Bray
Wyatt.
Dexter Loomis is an amazing athlete on NXT. He's got huge
charisma, a unique character (a mute artist with a creepy stare and a
penchant for kidnapping other Superstars), and a ton of in-ring skill.
His kip-up jumping turnaround leg drop is pretty damn impressive,
especially for a guy of his size. Not to mention how he's freaked out a
lot of other Superstars with the way he slithers across the ring, and
let's face it: his submission finishing move, Silence, is bad enough.
Having him cradle your head in his lap and stroke your hair after you're
unconscious is just wrong. ^_^
Why is it, then, that he has one
of the worst win/loss records in NXT? The only matches he has been
allowed to win have been the ones that don't forward his career in any
way. The two singles Championship matches he's been allowed, he was
cheated out of the win -- in neither match was he beaten straight up.
The other matches he's been involved in that had championship
implications, he was the third wheel and was included only for the fan
base, not because he was being given an actual shot at the title. Every
time he is closing in on a decisive win, "something" happens to cost him
the match.
And now, the Fiend. I've been a fan of the Wyatt
Family since they first arrived. In his incarnation as The Fiend, he has
terrified the WWE Universe. But in his current rivalry with Randy
Orton, WWE has completely wiffed. As usual, there was tons of energy put
into the setup -- the Inferno Match, the voodoo, Alexa Bliss's
transformation and possession, all of it -- but the execution was
lackluster at best. This was supposed to be the closing of a rivalry
that began when Randy Orton torched the swamp home of Bray Wyatt. But
once again, WWE has shunted a great storyline into the background.
They've turned this generation's Undertaker into a set piece, filling in
between Bad Bunny, MVP playing mouthpiece for Bobby Lashley, and the
eternal Flair fluff pieces.
As a final word on WWE's mismanagement of their talent, I have two questions. Roman Reigns, you first:
Weren't
you the guy who called Brock Lesnar a "cowardly bitch" on national
television for the way he conducted himself as champion? For the way he
held the championship hostage and avoided wrestling unless it was
pay-per-view? Aren't you that same guy who said that people who do that
disrespect the traditions that you've dedicated your life to?
Then, how is what you're doing any different? You've even picked up his old manager!
This last one is for you, Jay Uso:
You
call yourself "The Main Event" but the only match you've legitimately
won since Roman Reigns made you quit and brought you to heel was the
Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royale. Kudos on that, I mean it;
but...when are you going to actually win some matches on your own and
earn that name? Because, without Jimmy, you've proven you're not a
singles competitor. You talk about "The Uso Penitentiary." I live in a
real penitentiary, and let me tell you: we have a word for guys like
you, who lick the heels of your betters and do their bidding because you
can't stand on your own. You might as well be holding Roman's pocket
when you come out to the ring. Just saying.
This rant has been
brought to you by Cheshire Madness and is sponsored by IFW --
Incarcerated Fans of Wrestling; good talents tired of being mismanaged;
and the hopes that WWE wises up before they really start losing out; and
is still brought to you by the number 3. Thank you.
I AM The Kyle and I approved this message!
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