Saturday, May 23, 2015

Blog #8: Court Update

Hey, cats and kittens and truly hoopy froods! I just wanted to make you all aware that I am getting transferred this week to Loudoun County Adult Detention Center to prepare for my 30th June Evidentiary Hearing for my Habeas Corpus. If all goes well, my conviction will be overturned and I will be granted a new trial.
 

The only downside to this is that I will have to leave all my property behind and will be spending my time in a single cell with nothing to do!!! I'll try to upload more Strangeness while I'm there, but my Evil Minions are dealing with certain upheavals in their lives that resulted from an...er, *misunderstanding* concerning an entirely unlikely cardiovascular muscle of precious metal, a black hole, and a certain unnamed manic depressive, paranoid android...Suffice it to say, uploading The Stangeness might be a bit trickier than usual.
 

Not to worry, though! I will do my best to keep you all updated as the case progresses. Meanwhile, snail mail is the only means of communication open to me, unless you want me to call Collect, in which case you'll have to send me your number! ;)
 

Any and all Happy Thoughts, Happy-Happy-Joy-Joy well-wishes, positive energies, and prayers to divine entities and/or supernatural intelligences for intercession in my favour are greatly appreciated.

Until next you hear from me, or I you, keep your towel close, your S.E.P. field ready, and whatever you do, DON'T PANIC!!!
 

The preceding message has been brought to you by Cheshire Industries, a multidimensional collective of truly hoopy froods with way too much free time on our hands; and is brought to you by a big middle finger to the Vogon Constructor Fleet, their poetry, and all intergalactic bypasses; your local Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy correspondent; Life, the Universe, and Everything; and the number 42. Thank you.
 

I am The Kyle and I approved this message!
 

Monday, 25th May--Towel Day! If you aren't wearing your towel, you are *NOT* a truly hoopy frood!!!!!

2 comments:

  1. Hello! You don't know me, and I don't know you. However, I came across your story, and I felt the need to contact you, just to say I hope everything goes well for you. I admire you for your ability to stay so positive and optimistic (that is something a lot of people cannot do, even if they're blessed with much easier life circumstances). Anyways, you seem like a fun, nice person. Stay strong, and stay well. Greetings from the other side of the world - from a small eastern european country. Take care =)

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    Replies
    1. Vila,
      Your comment was read to me and it really touched my heart. I think its really cool that you were touched by my story and that you extended the hand of friend from your small eastern European town :) . If you would like to write please feel free as I am not able to send emails through my Evil Minion. Alternatively since snail over seas my Evil Minion is willing to print your emails and mail them to me. I really hope that you will write. I will write back and my letters will get scanned and emailed to you. Have a Happy Happy Joy Joy day.

      I am the Kyle.

      Kyle Hulbert
      LCADC
      42035 Loudoun Center Place
      Leesburg, VA 20175

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